Category Archives: music

My Sacred Musical Artist / Happy

During the summer, I was introduced to a podcast called Harry Potter and the Sacred Text. They take the Harry Potter books and chapter by chapter they discuss it through different themes like empathy and white privilege. The podcast really makes you think.

They also discuss the fact there is often a sacred text, songs, or even musical artists in our lives that we often rely on to get us through difficult times.

Throughout the years, my sacred song has changed depending on the season I am in my life. However, for the last 10 or so years, one artist keeps popping us as having songs that I have believe to be sacred to me. Mind you, I’ve loved her music since the early 2000’s when I first heard Just like a Pill. So who is this artist. She is P!nk, the badass I wish I was myself.

Okay, Get the Party started was a sacred song for me while I was pregnant with Oldest. That child was planning to stay in my uterus forever. I wanted my body to get the party started. It never worked. I was induced 4 days after his due date.

Then there was Perfect. I went through a period of time where I had students who were not the best. It was a really rough period. Lots of anxiety and depression during that time during that time in my life. I had lost family members, a former student of mine, and a high school friend. I tried to keep it together. As a self-help for myself, I discovered photography.

Hurts 2B Human

This past April, she came out with the newest album Hurts 2B Human. I can relate to so many of the songs. Whether in this time in my life or in my past. I want to discuss some of the songs and how it relates to my life.

Now mind you, it won’t be all in one post. I wouldn’t do that to you.

The first song I would like to discuss is Happy. This song was written about how I felt about myself in my teens until mid thirties.

The lyrics I can really relate to are
” Since I was 17
I’ve always hated my body
And it feels like my body’s hated me
Can somebody find me a pill to make me un-afraid of me? “

I’ve had a love/hate relationship with my body. I’m short waisted with long legs. Can you believe how awkward that combination is especially for a teen?

I always thought I was not attractive. Maybe it’s because of my awkwardness. It was not until I lost my grandma and I began to be in more photos that I realized that I was not as unattractive as I realized. Hubby would tell me that I was beautiful but it was not always enough for me to believe. What an awful way to live my life.

Another lyric I can relate to is
” Since I was 22
I’ve been with somebody who loves me
And I’ve been trying to believe it’s true.”

I have actually been with Hubby since I was 22. On October 17th, we’ve been together for 22 years which is going to be half of my life. For details of the time we got together, click on this link. That year was a hard year for me mentally, emotionally, and even physically.

How did I end up with someone who truly loved me? I don’t know. I was in a series of messed up relationships up until that moment. I could write a book on those relationships.

Am I scared to be happy? I don’t think so. I like being happy but there were times in my time that it was hard to be happy.

” (Don’t like to talk about my feelings) “

This is true. I don’t always like to talk about my feelings. I’m scared people will judge me.

I hope you’ll be kind and understand how this post made me vulnerable.

Have a magical day,
Traci